Personal Life

3 Year Anniversary & The Proverbial End Of My Life

2018 has not started well for me. I’ve been lagging on posting here. I lost my job, still haven’t gotten a car, and 3 days after Christmas my boyfriend broke up with me and gave me 2 weeks to move out of the house that I moved into 3 months earlier.

This is my 2018.

I logged on here to vent some feelings and it says “Today is your 3 year anniversary on WordPress!”

Yay. Another anniversary that means nothing anymore.

I’m going to be whiny and miserable for a little bit longer, but soon I’ll post something that isn’t complete drivel.

Thanks for letting me share that my life has gone up in flames.

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Music/TV/Movie · Uncategorized

Break Time

My birthday was last Friday. I’m 28 now. Things got busy and I didn’t NaNo for awhile and I didn’t post anything.

But break time is over, as I watch Adventure Time. I actually hated this show when I first caught glimpses of it as my daughter watched it. She was two? But I slowly got hooked. It was easy to get sucked it. It started off a little mindless.

But after 2 seasons, both the character and the show matured. It started tackling deeper issues–if in a roundabout way. It covers nontraditional relationships, puberty, and morality issues.

I’m not trying to do an in-depth review or anything. Watching it just has me thinking about how well they’ve been doing this show. It has the character growing in age and in the way he deals in with arising problems.

Does Wendy completely understand what’s happening in the later episodes? Probably not. Do I recognize when Finn handles a problem the way a child would before learning from it and handling it in a healthy way? Yes, yes I do.

It’s fun and light while still touching on actual issues.

I like it.

#Mathmatical

NaNoWriMo

So it begins…Tomorrow…

Tomorrow is November 1st. The first official day of NaNoWriMo. I’m really excited about this year. I have a rough outline to try to help me muddle through, I even planned out some plot bunnies to make me feel better about the inevitable tangent rambling I’m likely to go on, and I have someone who supports me writing.

When I say supports me, I mean he goes beyond just saying, “Oh, that sounds cool, you should do that.” He actually gives me time and space to write without trying to make me feel guilty about not spending the time with him. That’s not something I’ve had in a relationship before. It’s a nice, but unfamiliar, feeling.

I’m also working on a more inclusive schedule. Something that allows for NaNo writing, personal time, work, and freelancing. It is overwhelming, or at least it feels that way right now, and I am hoping a semi-flexible schedule will help with that nauseating feeling of upcoming failure.

Does anyone else have a set schedule during NaNo? Do you just have a list style or do you do a block schedule?

TeLl Me YoUr SeCrEtS!!!

7 Days of Random Blogging Series

Feeling content without hitting the goal – 7DORB Series

A week ago, I wrote a post setting a personal goal of writing 7 blog posts in 7 days. As you can see, I did not write 7 blogs in 7 days. You know what I did do though? I wrote 3 posts (not including the initial post and this one) in 7 days, which is more that the 1 post I wrote in 2 years that I started with.

I feel like I utterly failed with this goal, but I didn’t. I started this series as a way to pull myself out of a rut, to start writing again, and to get myself on the way to developing better writing habits. A blog post a day for 7 days was pretty ambitious since I have a full time job and I’m working on making my freelance business full time too.

I over-extended myself with this goal. I should have realized that when I was writing that first post, but I tend to bite off more than I can chew all of the time. I am learning to feel content with at least trying to reach the goal. If I know I put in a valid and genuine effort, why shouldn’t I still feel better about it? I went from having written 1 blog post in 2 years (longer before that) to writing 3 in one week with a full time job and freelance shit on the side. I managed my time.

That’s huge for me. Deadlines for clients, I’m motivated to prioritize those for obvious reasons, but personal goals I falter on. I feel like I’m probably going to fail anyway so I never really get started. But this, I kept going with. I am proud to write: I wrote 3 blog posts in one week. I can own that. I can feel good about that.

Now that I’ve failed (but still accomplished!) this goal, I will probably cut down my expectations a bit–for now–to one or two posts a week. I am dedicated to NaNoWriMo this year and have set a personal goal of 25k words. Truly, I hope to finish the 50k, get the badge, be able to say “Yeah, bitch, I wrote a 50k novel,” but I’ll be okay, I’ll be happy, with “I wrote everyday and reached 25k words. I hope to finish my novel in a couple of months.” That would feel amazing.

I am going to set a little calendar reminder and outline for November, to remind me to write a post and to NaNo.

This blog is still going to be messy, random, nonsensical musings, but I’ll be writing so I don’t give a fuck. I’ll post excerpts of my novel and progress here sometimes. Or I’ll write about pudding. Maybe I’ll do a book review. But, I will do something. I will be back. I will be writing.

I’m thinking posts will go up on Mondays and Wednesdays. Those are usually good days for me lately. Perhaps, even an extra post on Friday if I have the bit of time.

I’m excited for this. I feel good about this. I feel motivated.

I feel something other than apathetic, so definitely a step up.

I may have another post today, because I don’t think I’m going to have much going on at work. Who knows. We’ll see.

7 Days of Random Blogging Series

County Tyrone – Ireland 7DORB Series

County Tyrone, Ireland, from the Irish “Tir Eoghain” now in the province of Ulster, of the 32 traditional counties.

This is immediately what comes up from after googling county Tyrone, Ireland. Why  did I google that county specifically? If you read the first post in my 7 Days of Random Blogging Series, you’ll notice I wrote a random, haphazard post about my sirname and where it originates. History seems to agree that all of the O’Neals (including every spelling variation), are descendants of one of the first High Kings of Ireland, specifically originating in County Tyrone. Quick Note: There’s an O’Neill Dynasty. Yeah. For real.

We’re all supposed to be descendants of Niall of the Nine Hostages. Dude had a freaking title. Like Liam the Left-handed Boat Paddler or Darren the Destroyer.

CoTyrone

(Historic map of Country Tyrone, Ireland)

I love maps.

This has prompted me to create a Pinterest board dedicated to Ireland and a hopeful Ireland vacation at some point in my life.

This whole post has reminded me of a conversation I had with my dad a few months before he died. We were outside one morning at like 5 am, drinking coffee and smoking, when he started telling me about a dream he’d had. It was a cross between Braveheart and Highlander (his words) set in modern era. It was cheesy and, frankly, all over the fucking place, but it was interesting. He suggested I make a story out of it. I had kind of forgotten about it until now. I don’t have time to really get into it for NaNo this year, but maybe next year? Or just my next project over all?

Anyway, I keep getting distracted and behind on my series, so I’m gonna have like 3 posts today (even though I started this one yesterday).

Peace out.

7 Days of Random Blogging Series

Tabletopping Solo – 7DORB Series

I do not mean I was putting a top on a table I was building–that would constitute productivity and I will not abide that in my life. I’m referring to a type of role-playing board game, or a Tabletop Game. Some of you know what I’m talking about *wink* *nerds out*

The other day, my boyfriend and I actually had a full day off together. My daughter wanted to stay the weekend at her dad’s so we had a full day off–just us. We’re going back and forth with “What do you want to do today?” Finally, exasperated, he says, “Oh my god, go take a shower and get dressed.”

“Where are we going?”

“Just. Go. Shower.”

So I take a shower, and take my sweet time doing it, get dressed, and do my hair for once (by that I mean I put mousse in it). He gets dressed, we get in the car, and start driving. I haven’t lived in this area very long, we’ve only been living together for about 2 months or so now. I ask where we’re going and he says “You’ll Harley believe it.”

I have no fucking idea what he’s talking about.

We drive downtown and he stops in front of this little southern country boutique. I’m disgusted and ask why we’re there. “Because it’s Halloween!” he says, super proud of himself. I look annoyed and he points behind me at a little hanging sign that says Carolina Comics. Fuck Yes. It’s been forever since I’ve been to a comic book store and I’ve never been to this one. New stuff!

We go in and I start running around like a crazy person trying to see everything at once. Eventually, he calls me over to him and shows me a box. It’s a board game. IT’S A FUCKING FIREFLY BOARD GAME. Holy fuck. I squeak. I freak out. I didn’t even know this existed. I had just berated him last week for never having seen Firefly.

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(Look at this beautiful bitch right here! Also, my boyfriend’s shoe).

I see the price. I set it down. I walk the fuck away. I’m already $130 negative at my bank. This is not for me; not today.

So we’re moseying around, I’m touching everything, and he asks me if I see any of their D&D stuff.

“Have you ever played D&D?” I ask. “Would you?”

“Sure,” he says, somewhat non-committed. “I’ve never played, but if you want to, we can.”

So hot. So, I start wandering around, looking for the D&D aisle. There isn’t one. It’s a tiny little encap that I couldn’t even find until we asked the cashier. We look for a bit, I grab a comic for my daughter (Over the Garden Wall from Cartoon Network), and we go to check out. I find it a little odd when he says she can put the book in the big bag. We pick it up and go outside. Why is this heavy? I look and there’s a giant box inside.

“Oh shit, baby, she gave us someone else’s bag!” I’m already turning to head back inside.

“Look at it, you dummy”

I pull out the Firefly board game and attack him next to the car, squealing and hitting him in the chest.

“Happy birthday, baby. I’m not good at buying gifts so I let you pick out your own. Sort of.”

He’s the best. As soon as we get home I pull everything out and make him look at it with me.

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(This glorious mess makes my heart happy)

It was late, a giant storm/tornado was rolling in so we didn’t want to risk losing power in the middle of the game and opted for watching horror movies. I don’t think he wants to play at all, honestly, but he’ll indulge me eventually. I’m itching to play this fucking game.

Well, last night, while he was at work and I was bored, I said fuck it and pulled my game out. It said 1 to 4 players, that means I can play by myself right? Besides, I have no fucking idea how to play something like this.

Bam! It has a solo play card and I start getting set up with my trusty rulebook/game play card ready. I said 1 hour. It took about 2 to finish. Again, no idea what I was doing.

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(I’m pretty sure I was half way through and was doing it mostly correctly).

It was frustrating that I didn’t know what I was doing and a little lonely that I was playing by myself, but it was so fucking beautiful and new and interesting.

I might play again tonight. Or, I might wait for someone to play with me. I will definitely look up a YouTube how-to video, if one exists.

Thanks Gale Force 9 for creating this super awesome involved game like 4 years ago that I never knew about but apparently now how expansions for.

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(I’m pretty sure I had finished. I reached the goal I had chosen on my solo play card and it was late as fuck so I said that I won and put everything up).

Any other tabletop gamer peeps reading? Hit me up. If you have this game, please help me for the love of fuck’s sake. We’ll do a Skype or google hangout and play remote! I’m that desperate. I don’t really have friends here.

This also speaks to my love of Supernatural >

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(Badger = The King of Hell and I love it).

Writing Tips

GMC: The Swiss Army Knife of Writing Tools

I’m loving this woman’s process right now.

Kobo Writing Life

Tools for Writersby Chris Mandeville

One of the best things I ever did for my fiction writing was determine what my main character wants, why she wants it, and what’s in the way of her getting it. Figuring this out helped me know my character better (obviously), but also helped me to plot more effectively, build tougher villains, raise the stakes, and increase tension in my story. And I accomplished all this through the use of one tiny but powerful tool, “GMC.”

Debra DixonI guess you could say GMC is the Swiss Army Knife of writing tools—compact, multi-functional, indispensable, and fits neatly in your pocket. I never leave home without it. And now you can have one, too. But it’s not sold for a low, low price via a very special television offer that’s only good for the next ten minutes. No, it’s available in abbreviated form here on this very blog, and…

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Writing Tips

NaNoPlanno: Tools for NaNoWriMo Prep

I’m doing NaNoWriMo this year! Are you?

Kobo Writing Life

By Chris Mandeville

NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month: a frenzy of writing with the goal of producing a 50,000-word novel during the thirty days of November.

NaNoWriMo is a great opportunity to push yourself as a writer. It’s all about quantity of words, not quality. It’s vomit writing, spilling your guts, taking an idea and running with it, sans editing, revision, and second-guessing. It goes to the core of the creative process of writing: putting words on the page.

The official NaNoWriMo was created by author Chris Baty in 1999 and is now run by the nonprofit National Novel Writing Month. Hundreds of thousands of writers have participated over the past eighteen years, writing billions of words.

Why do so many people set out to write 50,000 words in just thirty days? There’s a lot to be gained beyond wordcount: NaNo forces you to focus, put writing higher…

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7 Days of Random Blogging Series

My Surname’s History – 7DORB Series

Technically, I already made a post today for my 7 Days of Random Blogging Series, but I’m not going to count it because it was an introduction. I shouldn’t count it, right? Also, I’m bored and don’t have much else to do right now, so why not roll on with a blog post.

My first in the series is a blog post on my last name, O’Neal. Now, I have site that I’m going to link here, but it’s not necessarily specific to my family line. It’s specific to my last name and every variation of. I don’t have time to do a complete genealogy search to make sure that this is specific to me. I mean, I guess I do, but not enough to really make a difference so fuck it. I chose to go ahead with it, because it has a son listed as William O’Neal, which is my grandfather’s name. I’m pretty sure it’s a family name anyway. Who cares? Irish history and historical people who share your name are interesting anyway.

I picked a date when I googled my last name: 1776. As interested as I am in Ireland and Irish culture, I was born in the United States. I’ve always been interested in how my home country came to be (even though it’s full of shitty people and genocide) because it was started by telling douchebags to fuck off and protesting their douchebaggery. I like to think my family had a hand in protesting terrible things.

Spoiler–The William O’Neal I found in the information of this website said that he was a Quaker and didn’t do shit at first.

A quick image search turns up a serious fuck ton of “O’Neal Crests.” I picked the first one that spelled O’Neal the right way (in my opinion obviously). It proves to me that we’re all a whole other level of extra.

oneal crest1

(Look at this badass fancy as fuck helmet with cat-things and a nonchalant fish)

This isn’t even the most extra one.

I have always loved my name and it’s connection to a long history in another country. Like most people, I’m a complete grab bag of European ancestry, but my last name gives me a definitive starting place. When I was in 10th grade, I was in a creative writing class as my elective (it was rarely ever offered in our 200 student or less high school). My teacher in that class gave me a book she’d picked up while on vacation about early Irish history. I can’t remember the exact title for the life of me and it drives me fucking crazy. Half the book was dedicated to the O’Neals and how they were the first Kings of Ireland or some shit. It gave me a pretty high opinion of my name, but most importantly, it got me truly interested in my family’s history. Here’s a link that talks a bit about that. I didn’t go too much into it, so yeah.

One day I hope to be able to travel to Ireland and maybe visit the actual piece of ground my ancestors are from. I want to feel connected to a place on a new level. I think one of the reasons I’m so into my family history is because I feel like I need something to define me. I don’t feel like I have a definition. I don’t have a sense of my own self. I fill that with a sense of person history based on my name.

This post didn’t have much structure or point really. If you’re an O’Neal, or know an O’Neal, leave a comment. Let’s connect. Maybe we’re cousins. Share a history you might know.

7 Days of Random Blogging Series

7 Days of Random Blogging

So, to get back in the swing of things, I’m going to do a stream of consciousnesses blog every day. I’m going to think about whatever topic and then write about it. Depending on how interesting I end up finding the topic, it’ll vary between making sense or having a clear direction, or it’ll just be me rambling about what other thoughts that topic leads me to.

I don’t know. That’s half the fun. It’s a no pressure blog series that I can have fun with. Maybe it’ll be informative. Maybe, distracting for everyone. Maybe it’ll give me some samples for my freelance business if they turn out well. Who knows.

Hopefully the creative freedom will keep me writing and not going crazy. I need to work on something other than my freelance stuff (which is starting to melt my brain I think) and my NaNoWriMo plot for Novemeber (which is also starting to melt my brain). Full disclosure, I’ve never written a plot or characters for NaNo, nor have I ever finished 50k words because Holy Fuck that’s a lot of words and I have trouble writing a 250 word blog post more than once every 2 years.

Enjoy this free stock photo of a pen and paper.